Friday 13 December 2013

Quarter Life Crises

Quarter life crises are a period in which a person is more or less doubtful about their own lives and a hell lot of things are running at the back of the mind. Early twenties is something where everyone would be looking at Cat or some other competitive exams or jobs or career shifts. Here the person tends to struggle a lot with one owns dream as well as the environment around him. This is time when one wants to go in opposition to the crowd but the realization of strengths and potentials does not take place or if it happens earlier one will not be aware about it. One is surrounded by the endless expectations of parents, friends, professors etc and most important rule is played girlfriend/boyfriend where one began to feel so much insecure about upcoming 3 to 4 years also a ray of fear develops and also one doesn't know where he or she is now.

The worst feeling which arouse is that your friends whom you think is your true mates gets selfish with your up gradation in life. Also you start realizing that the people you thought as greatest ones are not at all worth and the ones whom you left behind were very imp in life. You start making friends instead of building trust.
At one moment the enjoyment of all the culfests, canteen parties, hangouts, picnics with friends turn to search for job when you are not placed on campus and you keep getting scared about the worst things waiting for you ahead.

Your opinions tend to grow stronger. You not only see, but also start analyzing what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and what you can do with your life. And you constantly keep adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't, what you can do and what you can’t. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. One minute you are overwhelmed and then the next, you are sorely sad.

You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try to cling on to the past with all the force in you, but soon you realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward. You try and move on, take few steps and then fall again, you get scared, and you start putting up high walls. You create your dream world, you fall in love with your imagination, and you realize you are not perfect, but then no one is.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you see someone walking by, hand-in-hand and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you're doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.

You will look at your job, you will end up staring at the huge screens in front you, and you’ll think it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing. Somewhere down the years, you might talk to an old friend, maybe making lesser then you, but is exactly at the place he wanted to be, following his passion.
There might come a point where you will just look at your salary slips and wonder if this all you are worthy of! You will worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself. Eventually, you will realize your potential, the urge of doing something great, and you realize that winning the race would be great, although right now you'd just like to be a contender!

But what we fail to understand is that we aren't alone in the race of life! Quest of knowing, discovering one’s self. What we don’t realize is we are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out. What we don’t realize is may be just a small text, a mail or a phone call may soothe and ease the confusion. May be a brave step, a career shift, or a small tiny failure may lead us to our greatest of potential. May be just a simple talk with a friend over coffee might help you feel like they aren't alone in their state of confusion. We fail to realize that being candid, not only will get the best of ourselves but would also serve the purpose to take the step needed.

What we fail to realize is, at the end of the day the thing that matters is how well you have followed your dreams and how happy you are with the things around you and not just about high positioned and high paid jobs.  It also takes into consideration that are you enjoying your life in all the processes or not. This time will never return and the energy of this time will also go in vain if not utilized in appropriate direction.